I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
