please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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