I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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