I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
