They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
we're so committed to being not committed
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
