Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
