at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
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