So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
