I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
