we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
