this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
And then he peed in my hair
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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