My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
do nipples grow back?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
