i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
