I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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