So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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