He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
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