its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
