She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
