Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Randomize