Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
