He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
