She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
