I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
