Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
