im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
and she was petting her beer can
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize