My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Randomize
