Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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