Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
