I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
