White coat. Heels.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
