I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize