I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
The air was thick with penises
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
