I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
