Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
