Sry I called you an 8
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize
