I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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