i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
