she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
