ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
