Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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