how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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