uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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