would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Randomize
