so explain again why im purple
no
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
