Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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