i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
