I'm drive I can fine osifer
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Pants are for mortals
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
