Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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