i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize