My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize
